free stats Carmen's Web: The Fellowship of the Ring
Sunday, May 13, 2007
The Fellowship of the Ring
As per Toots' suggestion, I have decided to refer to my engagement as "The Fellowship of the Ring". Since there's no bigger LOTR fan than the boyfriend, it seems appropriate. I suppose he needs to be called the fiance now...

Apologies for keeping you guys waiting on updates and thank you all so much for all the wonderful comments. They've been the frosty icings on top of a very sweet cake. I've been on cloud nine for the past two weeks and even though I know I've got a lot to deal with, I've never been this happy.

I'm happy. Really, really happy. My cup runneth over happy. I didn't think I would feel this way. I thought that when we got to this point nothing would really change. But I've been basking in this post-proposal glow for two weeks.

All this while still not having uttered a word of this to my parents--two people I see every single day. I thought it would feel strange. I mean, I've lived parallel lives my entire life. I'm used to it. But this is BIG. This is official. It is now real. I thought that taking the ring off before I get home everyday would've gotten me down and out, but it hasn't. I don't feel as fractured as I felt pre-proposal. You'd think it would be the opposite, no?

I'm planning on telling them early this summer. I need to get past these four weeks of school before I break it to them (FOUR WEEKS OF SCHOOL AND I'M DONE WITH MY FIRST YEAR OF TEACHING!!!! AM REALLY, REALLY EXCITED!!!) I don't know who I need to sit down first, the father or the mother. Or if I should do a dry run with my uncle. I'm torn between lying ("he converted") or standing up for myself. My brother tells me that if I choose to lie I shouldn't really look down on myself. Self-preservation, he says. It doesn't mean that I've sold myself or my beliefs out.

The problem with lying about novio ("fiance" in Spanish) converting is that he wouldn't be comfortable with it at all. While I'm comfortable presenting different faces to different people, what you see is what you get with him. I can't imagine him wearing a different mask when he's around my parents.

We've been talking a lot about the wedding, novio and I. He needs a big wedding (the youngest of 12 and all), I need one NOW. I don't want to wait for him anymore. While I would love to have time planning something beautiful and unique, I don't feel like waiting another year to start my life with him. He wants to have a ceremony at an obscure hall in the Bronx, I told him that if an idea like that was ever mentioned again I would call the whole thing off. Vineyards, pseudo-castles, Central Park, the New York Public Library, and the Brooklyn Botanical Garden are all high on my list of wedding venues. Which means I need to either win the lotto or rob a bank.

I'm happy. Despite the inevitable storm that's about to hit, I'm just happy.
Thoughts shared by Carmen at 7:49 AM
| link to this post
| 19 added their 2 cents worth! |

Who: Carmen

xx-something egyptia-yorker who's spent over half her life stuck in two worlds not of her own making. unable and unwilling to fully embrace one identity over the other, she created (is trying to create) her own place in the world where people love each other unconditionally, irrespective of artificial boundaries, and where dancing merengue is as necessary to life as breathing air.

Want more? Click here!

You can email me here image hosting and photo sharing