free stats Carmen's Web: New Years Blah
Monday, January 01, 2007
New Years Blah
Spent the entire day uploading music on my new iPod, an early birthday present courtesy of the boyfriend. He was trying to keep it a secret (my birthday is next week) but his brother slipped up during a New Year's Eve gathering last night and let the cat out of the bag. BF had no choice but to give it to me. Well, he had a choice. But my nagging kinda got in the way.

Uneventful day, really. I hate big days. Big arbitrary days that are supposed to demarcate your life. It's too much pressure. I felt like I should've been doing something today, enjoying it somehow. First day of the rest of your life kinda thing. Instead, my iPod and I got to know each other and I watched eight episodes of "Love Soup". And I didn't get out of my jammies.

I'm getting bored with the pace of my life. This job sucked me into a whirpool that I keep having difficulty getting out of. I can't remember the last time I went to the gym or did something just for myself. I don't even know what my hobbies are anymore, that's how long it's been that I've done something fun.

So here are some of my New Years resolutions:

1. Make quality time for myself

I'm dedicated to my job, but there is such a thing as TOO dedicated. I will try to do something different/fun at least once a week. I'll take a cooking class, art class, language class, anything. But it's got to be something that has nothing to do with my job. I'm open to suggestions.

2. Spend quality time with:

a. friends
Can't recall the last time I spent time with a friend. Shit, I can't remember the last time I SAW a friend.

b. family
I may live with my parents, but there is nothing quality about the time I spend with them. I'm not sure what I can do to improve it. My father is glued to his computer, my mother is addicted to her ART. It doesn't help, either, that I'm living a secret life.

3. Spend quality time with the boyfriend

I see him mostly for a couple of hours on the weekends and while it may have been acceptable for a while, it's beginning to wear and tear our relationship. All of the fights we've been getting into all revolve around the fact that I want to spend quality time with him. In either case, we gotta pick up the pace on this relationship. We keep treading carefully on thin ice, afraid to make any big moves but I'm afraid if we don't make them soon we're going to keep having problems.

Hmmmmm....seems "quality" is the buzz word for this year.
Thoughts shared by Carmen at 8:15 PM
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Who: Carmen

xx-something egyptia-yorker who's spent over half her life stuck in two worlds not of her own making. unable and unwilling to fully embrace one identity over the other, she created (is trying to create) her own place in the world where people love each other unconditionally, irrespective of artificial boundaries, and where dancing merengue is as necessary to life as breathing air.

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