free stats Carmen's Web: Silence is Golden, part II
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Silence is Golden, part II

SO I come home from school and start doing some work on the computer. My aunt is having some family drama so she's staying with us for the moment. Not my favorite aunt. Not the smartest one either.

So I'm working. She's sitting in the living room and I see her fidget. It's apparent that the silence is making her uncomfortable and I was hoping she'd keep her trap shut long enough for me to be able to finish my work. My wish didn't come true.

She asks me why I think Zidane buttheaded that Italian and I told her that he was probably called a terrorist.

"Still, he needs to control himself. But what can you expect from an Arab. All Arab men are animals."

I tell her that that's not true and blanket statements like that are a little ignorant. I give her examples, my father, my brother, her son, my ex-fiance etc. She continues to insist that all Arab men are animals and then said it was just in their nature.

Me: "Don't say that to me. I don't believe in that nature crap"

Her: "What do you mean you don't believe in it? It's biology. It's genetic. All Arab men are violent and animals. It's in their blood".

I ask her again to stop saying that but she keeps insisting. She tells me about a kitten she adopted from the streets of Egypt a couple of years ago. She brought kitty to this country and told me that she'd never seen such an aggressive cat. "It's in the nature of the Egyptians". What the fuck was the only phrase I was able to form in my head to that ridiculous statement. Aggressive Egyptian cats.

Me: "So M, why did you marry an Egyptian if you know this about their nature?"

Her: "Ya3ni eh why did I marry an Egyptian? Who else was I supposed to marry, a Hindi?"

Me: "Sure. If you think all Arab men are dogs, why not marry a Hindi?"


She shot me a dirty look and started bringing up the nature thing again in an effort to "educate" my feeble mind.

Me: "So then you're telling me that we are the way we are because everything is genetic?"

Her: "Of course ya S"

Me: "Fine. So then homosexuality cannot be a sin."


Her face cringed at the term "homosexuality" and said that of course it's a sin.

Me: "How can it be a sin if it's genetic?"

Her: "It's abnormal! It's a sickness!"

Me: "Okay, I get it, but if it's genetic it must mean that God created it that way; that one has no choice but to be gay. Are you trying to say that God made a mistake?"

Her: "Astaghfarullah! What are you saying?!"

Me: "I'm not saying anything. You're telling me that people are the way they are because they're born that way. So homosexuality must be something God created. So then it cannot be a sin. Unless God is wrong of course. Is God wrong?"


She stared at me for a bit, probably wishing she had left the uncomfortable silence silent instead of getting into this debate with me.

Her: "No, of course not. It's just a sickness. Bas nature, S. El nature is strong. Ya3ni bossi 3al Aspan (I mean, look at the Spanish)..."

Me: "M, stop. Don't even go there"

Her: "What? El Aspan, especially the women..."


I'm getting aggravated and I cut her off before she says something that's really going to piss me off.

Me: "I'm serious. I don't want to hear what you're going to say because it's bullshit (I said the actual word). 95% of my friends are Spanish and they're the nicest, most incredible people you'll ever meet in your life. My friends are my family, the women who you were about to curse are the greatest women on the planet, the greatest women you'll ever encounter."

Her: "But..."

Me: "No but. I refuse to hear what you want to say. I don't want to hear anything about nature, about the Spanish, about Egyptians, or cats".


She stayed quiet and I was afraid I had overstepped my boundaries, but you know what? I didn't care. My parents raised me to be a decent woman who stands up to injustice and sheer stupidity. She didn't continue the conversation and just walked away. I felt slightly guilty (I hate hurting people's feelings) but there was no other way for this conversation to go.

The blacks (el sood) must have improved ten-fold in Jersey...I can't believe she skipped them and directly attacked el Aspan.

Silence. She should've just maintained its state. (It's a precious gift, Herlock!! ;)
Thoughts shared by Carmen at 8:37 PM
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Who: Carmen

Mini-Bio:
xx-something egyptia-yorker who's spent over half her life stuck in two worlds not of her own making. unable and unwilling to fully embrace one identity over the other, she created (is trying to create) her own place in the world where people love each other unconditionally, irrespective of artificial boundaries, and where dancing merengue is as necessary to life as breathing air.

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